I’m a transsexual woman, never been a boy

A lot of people are confused about transgender women denying that they were a boy before. We do not deny it because we’ve never been a boy. Now I bet you just want to stop reading thinking that I’m talking bullshit but no I’m not, I am seriously telling the truth, I have never been a boy. If only I was a boy and woke up one day wanted to become a woman then it could have been easier to make you understand. But it’s not as simple as changing what you have ordered in the dinner. Being a transsexual women and the transition that I have been through is beyond on my anatomical being.  Alright, let me try my best to simplify it for you.

Look if not all then most of us know and admit that we were born with male genitalia. It was the doctor, midwife or whoever was there on my birth date who called me a boy. If only I could speak during that time, I could have said no. From this time we can safely say that part of our society who labeled me a “boy” that contributes to the community’s difficulties in understanding transgender women like me.  As I grew up it has been instilled in my mind that I am a boy and should be doing stuffs for boys. What is their basis to categorise a transsexual woman like me as a boy? As simple as my assigned sex at birth, don’t you think they took advantage of my innocence and just speak on my behalf, labeled me with out even considering who I really want to be? So this is where the confusion starts. Because the people who were there on my birth date had no idea regarding human diversity and gender preferences, though I am not blaming them since it has something to do with culture and the society’s demand that I need to be a boy. And so immediately categorise me as a male identified child. Once again, I have not identified my self as a boy at that that time, obviously my speech ability haven’t developed yet. What they do not know or should I say forgot to consider, is that I have emotions of my own and a mind telling me that I want to be a girl who wants to play with other girls. I turn 7 years old and it both confirm and made me so damn confused about my identity. My heart, my mind were telling me that I want to be a girl, soon to be woman and have boyfriend. But my body said no I am not and pressured by the society’s role assigned to me at birth. See how confusing  and difficult a transgender woman/s life can be. I don’ think we are worthy to be called as freaks. And this is the part that most people do not understand. Our minds, our hearts and our souls didn’t align with the assign sex when we were born. Thus we can say we have never been a boy, though there was that male genitalia when we were born but that is not the basis of what gender identity. Society don’t have the right to give us certain roles at birth that needs to be played for the rest of our lives, other wise freedom shouldn’t be a word.

We have the so called expression but I do not only express my self as a woman but I also identified my self as one. What is between in my legs is surely non of you business. Thus I say I am a transsexual and had never been a boy.

  • Rod Fleming

    Well said. I have researched this for the last 10 years or so and have read many (!) academic papers published all over the world. Two things should be made clear: the first is that current findings based on brain scans strongly suggest that transsex has a neurological cause. The second is that despite significant misinformation being disseminated by certain professional bodies, the prevalence of transsex is roughly the same everywhere. Only the apparent prevalence changes; in more relaxed cultures, people feel more free to be who they really are, and in more repressive ones, they hide. However the figures first developed by Professor Conway et alia have been broadly confirmed again and again at around 1-2%, with a range from 0.5% (1:200) to 5% (1:20). I have also deeply researched the historical prevalence, and transsex has been a recorded phenomenon for over 5,000 years. (Eanna Temple of Inanna, Uruk, Sumer). In other words, transwomen have been written about since we invented writing.

    So we have physical evidence for a physical cause, a prevalence that is consistent everywhere and a history of the phenomenon that stretches back thousands of years.

    Only an innate cause could produce these results and an innate cause must be genetic. The specific cause remains obscure, but pleiotropy or genetic ‘hidden agendas’ (the fact that one gene may produce several characteristics which are not related) has been posited, by, amongst others, Professor of Neurology VS Ramachandran. Furthermore, it is possible that the genetic effect is acting on the person’s mother, not the person themselves, causing differences in the hormonal flow to the developing foetus. At the moment we do not know, but this does not hinder the overall argument.

    In addition, all of the above is consistent with the stated experience of transpeople themselves, who repeatedly confirm that they are the gender they feel themselves to be and have been so since their earliest memory.

    In other words, the EVIDENCE tells us that transwomen are women who have some male physical characteristics at birth. They ARE NOT MEN, and NEVER WERE. (The reverse applies equally to transmen.)

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  • Krungtep Look

    I am going to present a small argument here. Transpeople but specifically Thai Ladyboys vary immensely in their attitudes about themselves. I have to say that those who are more mature (in my experience at least) are more comfortable with themselves. They do not insist they are women they accept themselves as a third gender, a special kind of woman——ladyboys; special people in their own right not an adjunct to any other gender.

  • Quinn Sioco Tesorero

    sometimes I feel like I want to fully give in to my urge of becoming as a full woman but too many things are making me to hold on with that thought. I am an out and proud gay man, but somewhere in my mind lingers a question that I might actually be trans but because of restrictions, I couldn’t fully commit to becoming a trans woman. I’m in a relationship and I don’t think my boyfriend will be happy in my decision of becoming a woman. he frowns at me when i go camp (which I really am) so being a woman might be an end dealer between him and I. Also, I feel like it will be a lot of work to become a lady… is this a normal thing? did you ever experienced this? also, is it hard to transform into a woman? I praise your courage by the way in the recent event in your life. kudos.

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